When I need a laugh

I read this text from a friend, which I kept because it was so random and funny:

There is a drunk guy at the bar playing a guitar he just won at hardtimes. He has no idea how to play it and he's singing the song '[friend's name]' at the top of his lungs. Oh, and he keeps referring to me as his seductive bartender. I so need to get out of here.

Classic.