'Let Them Know They're Enough'

At my daughter's back-to-school night the helicopter parents were there in force, and the teachers knew it. My daughter's extended language arts teacher handled it beautifully.

"Extended" means "advanced" -- the higher level version of the class. So naturally, it's a class that includes many, let's say, "intimately involved" parents. Which is good! Really. But there's a line between involved and overbearing. I have to watch where my toe's going.

But all that to say, this is a class where the students are precocious, and some parents may be obnoxious. God bless 'em . . .

So, my daughter's teacher, Mrs. P., relayed a story to illustrate a point. She said when she first became pregnant, she didn't think, "I hope I have the next president" or "I hope I have the next Olympic gold-medal winner." She said, "I hope that he's healthy -- just that he's healthy." And then "if he ties his shoe, that's a bonus," and "if he graduates high school, that's a bonus." But just that he is, she said, "that's enough. He is enough just as he is, however he is." This is the point where I got a little verklempt.

She noted how she came from Fairfax County, Va., where if you didn't letter/pin in three sports and get nothing but A's, you weren't doing something right; you weren't enough. Meanwhile her mom always let her know she was enough; she loved her as she was, and it made all the difference in Mrs. P's life. She said that she knew the types of students in this class pushed themselves hard. "If they miss a homework assignment, they're in tears," she said. "They don't know if it will be all right."

Mrs. P. then looked at the parents and respectfully asked us always "to let them know that they're enough," no matter what. Wise words.

(My post first appeared at The Point.)